I have been a bit shell-shocked in recent weeks after receiving an unpleasant email and a number of unkind and misinformed tweets following some perfectly reasonable comments that I made to a reporter from the Daily Telegraph. The penalty for sticking one's head above the parapet, I suppose. So it was a real tonic to receive this email:
Dear Beaumont Society
I am not TRANS, but I would like it known amongst all your members, and beyond that EMMA and ANN of Little Downham, nr. Ely in Cambridgeshire, came into my life, through an introduction by Mrs Carol Hebbard, at a particularly low point in my life AND SAVED IT!!!
I WILL NEVER FORGET THE FACT THAT THEY OPENED THEIR DOOR AND FRIENDSHIP TO ME.
THEY ARE GOOD PEOPLE THAT I MISS!!
Yours sincerely
Kurt Fuller
Jane, I understand you find it stressful getting unpleasant emails and unkind and misinformed treats. Work out how to deal with your reactions to those and carry on the good work.
As leader of the Beaumont we look up to you to stick your head above the parapet in the ongoing dialogue about “trans/non binary/whatever you call yourself, it’s fine with me.”
Misinformed treats? Tweets. Sorry. I think the BS need to do more campaigning.
Misinformed treats? Tweets! Thankyou Mr Freud!
And it is nice to know that they took the time to write. Most people only bother when there is something negative to say.
A few years ago, my mother phoned WH Smiths HQ to sing the praises of a shop assistant in her local branch who had been particularly helpful. She tried to explain the nature of her call to the person on the other end of the phone, but they immdediately put her through to the complains department! Yep, there really was no process in place to pay a compliment.
So….. I shall now take this opportunity to personally thank YOU Jane for the sterling work that you do. XX
Thank you Dorothy and Sophie for your kind words. I have been to a Pride event today, and although it was quite a small event, it was so uplifting to see people of all ages and gender identities having fun together and being waved to and smiled at by the onlookers – apart from the one who insisted on shouting “Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.”
Hi Jane, good that you’re out and about on our behalf. How did the LGBTQ people at the evenr deal with the heckler? Did you get to talk to any media while you were there?
Hi Dorothy,
The heckling was while we were processing round the town – it was Yeovil in Somerset. The LGBT+ people just laughed at him, blew their whistles etc. No media as far as I was aware. It was a fairly small event – perhaps 200 of us – arranged at short notice. It was just great to be part of it. Jane xx
Jane, that fits with my understanding and experience of anti LGBTQ prejudice. People outside the big cities are more likely to be be hostile to us because of ignorance. And our friends in those places are more likely to tell us to “keep it down” in public in terms of our dress and behaviour. Glad you were part of the Pride event. Dorothy xx
In reality, people are allowed to hold an opinion whether we agree with them or not. The Pride Marches were originally a demonstration for equality and people have a right to counter demonstrate. “Dealing ” with these people is just what they want so that they can justify their prejudices. They are looking for confrontation. As for living outside big cities, I find that rural areas tend to just accept any one and may talk about you but rarely say anything offensive to you. They are not ignorant, but simply don’t care.
Hi Chloe, I respect your opinion. Yes of course these other people can hold an opinion, counter demonstrate etc etc. But I believe in order to progress, there needs to be engagement and dialogue, not simply a continuation of prejudices on both sides. That’s what I call “dealing with it.”
My concern about people in rural areas comes about from experience because three different men I have seeing over the last few years, in Romsey, Aldermaston and Gloucestershire, said quite categorically that they were concerned about what people would think of me bla bla if I was dressed like bla bla bla or liviing in gender
My concern isn’t whether the people living iin these places actually say or do anything. It’s what the people I was with were thinking.
Thanks, Dorothy
You could well be right. Some people struggle with the whole concept of diversity because they assume that everyone should be like them. This is possibly because everyone they know is like them; or at least that is what they think. Transgender Day of Visibility is a good idea to focus attention, but perhaps every day should be a day of visibility for those who are able to do so.
Jane, thanks for all the work you do on our behalf and so pleased you took part in the Pride event in Yeovil and, yes, I know that putting your head above the parapet can be a scary and unwelcoming action to take, but we do need people like you to stand up and fight back against the prejudices and misinformation that is being spread around so much in the mainstream media – so good to see your response was actually for the Daily Telegraph not a well known trans-supportive publication. If I can make a small plug I have applied to fly the Beaumont banner (and yes it is a real banner) at Southampton Pride this coming Saturday (still waiting for confirmation) and would welcome any other member that would like to march along with me or just attend a large Pride event with our LGBTQIA+ community and show the public that we are normal people nothing like the way we are portrayed.